Your Dog Knows When You're Stressed

 

“Oh, for God’s sake. What does he want now?”

Her tone had Bert growling low in his throat. “Pillow.” Her code word for stand down had the dog relaxing again but watching her for any distress.

The Witness

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Natalia King from Austin, Texas, United States, CC BY 2.0 <https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0>, via Wikimedia Commons

A recent study found that dogs can determine when humans are stressed by smelling their sweat and breath.

Martha Stewart

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She gave him a little shove.

He gave her a little nudge.

And behind him the dog growled low in his throat.

“Stop!” Fiona ordered sharply, and the dog froze. “Newman, friend. Friend. He thought you were hurting me. No, don’t back off. Simon,” she said to the dogs. “We’re playing. Simon’s a friend. Put your arms around me.”

The Search

The heart of a dog's veterinary experience

 

She slammed the door and stalked into the living room, where both her brother and his dog were sprawled out like the dead.

"I need to talk to you, Casanova."

"Don't yell." Flynn remained on the sofa. On the floor beside him Moe whimpered. "Moe needed his shots. We've both been traumatized. Go away. Come back tomorrow."

 

Key of Light

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U.S. Air Force photo by SrA Veronica Pierce, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

Heart rate responses in dogs vary across a standard physical examination

The results suggest that undergoing a simulated physical examination, even in a mock veterinary setting, can be a stressful experience for dogs.

Science Direct

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“You know,” Fiona panted, using her own body to hold Newman’s down, “this dog would walk through fire for me. Through fire over broken glass while meteors rained out of the sky. But I can’t get him to just hold the hell still for a routine exam. And he knew. The minute I called them to get in the car, he knew. How many times do I put them in the car for work, for play, for whatever? How does he know? I had to get the others in first -  they’re more easily fooled. Then drag him. It’s humiliating,” she said to Newman. “For both of us.”

The Search

How to Make Friends

"Oh, I had friends. Somewhere along the line I'd learned 

that if you didn't try so hard, if you just

relaxed and acted naturally, that there were 

a lot of people who'd like you for what you were."

Convincing Alex

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By Aman dsc - Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0, 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=76911587

It takes effort, but it's not impossible.

REAL SIMPLE

Can Love Last a Lifetime?

He remembered the

clever child, the coltish adolescent, 

the irresistible bloom of the young woman. 

The bloom had blossomed 

seductively. 

And he could feel the pull that had always

 been between them.

Honest Illusions

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By Gardenermd - Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0, 
https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=76491765

From Infatuation to a Lifelong Symphony

Can romantic love last or, by its very nature, does it have a best before date?

Psychology Today

This Is What Playfulness Does To Your Relationship

"You can work eight, twelve hours a day," Parks continued. 

"You can enjoy your job, be terrific at what you do, 

but you still need to throw a Frisbee now and again."

"Frisbee?" This brought on a baffled laugh that pleased him. 

The hands on his shoulders relaxed. "What are you talking about?"

''Fun, Brooke. A sense of the ridiculous, laziness, riding Ferris wheels. 

All those things that make working worthwhile."

She had the uncomfortable feeling she was being expertly 

led away from the subject at hand.

 "What does riding a Ferris wheel have to do with you and me making love?"

Rules Of The Game

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Peter Drier [CC BY 2.0 (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)]

I’ll be the first to admit, well, maybe not the first, but I’m admitting it anyway: 

it’s not that easy to be playful.

Even when I know that playfulness and fun bring more harmony, 

delight, surprises and loving kindness in my relationship. 

Even science confirm that playfulness makes the relationship more strong.

Jolanda Herc

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"Throw a few Frisbees with me, Brooke. Ride a

few waves. Let's see where it takes us."

Looking at him, she could feel her resistance melting. 

Before she could prevent it, her hand had lifted

from his shoulder to brush at the hair that fell over his forehead. 

"You make it sound so simple,"

she murmured.

"Not simple." He took her other hand and pressed his lips to the palm. 

"Even fun isn't always simple."

Rules Of The Game

Self-Soothing

He could hear the funeral tones of Mozart's Requiem

coming from the parlor.

If Miranda was playing that, he knew the trip hadn't gone well.

He found her curled up in a chair in front of the fire, bundled into 

her favored gray cashmere robe, sipping tea from their grandmother's

best china.

All of her comfort tools, he noted, neatly in place.

Homeport

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By Aman.the.dark - Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0, 
https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=49293460

It might not be a concept we’re familiar with nor might we know what
sorts of things might soothe us, but at times when we feel particularly anxious
or distressed, self-soothing can be a useful part of our mental health toolkit.

blurt

Cries Every Girl Knows Way Too Well

A man who had three sisters knew all about women's tears. 

There were the slow, rather lovely ones that could slide down a female

cheek like small, liquid diamonds and reduce a man to begging. 

There were hot, angry ones that spurted out of a woman's eyes like

clear fire and induced a wise man to run for cover.

And there were those that were hidden so deep in the heart that 

when they broke loose and stormed free they were a deluge of pain

beyond any man's comfort.

So he let her be, let her curl into herself on the bottom step while those 

heart-born tears raged. He knew that the hurt that spawned

such a flood closed her off. All he could do was give her privacy, and wait.

Homeport

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By Fulvio Spada from Torino, Italy - Crying tulip, CC BY-SA 2.0,

 https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=40588066

The female gender, as a whole, is infamous for being overemotional, and for shedding tears when and where tears, quite frankly, need not be shed.

In fact, it seems as if nearly any single thing can trigger us, sending us into a downward emotional spiral (feminism, amiright?). Of course, not all ladies are like this; some women are stone cold walls of non-emotion, and some have their sh*t together. I envy both.

Elite Daily

Rekindled romances are so intense

He wasn't the young man who had once loved her. Nor was she the same

woman. They were more patient now. They didn't tumble onto the bed,

but lowered slowly, knowing each moment was precious when so many had

been lost.

And yet, though they had changed, their bodies moved easily together.

When she reached for him the years seemed to vanish.

Public Secrets 

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By Виктория Злых - Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0, 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=76837594

The psychology of why rekindled romances are so intense

Last month, the New York Times’ Modern Love column told the tale of two romantic relationships that ended and were then rekindled many years later. The author’s romance first ended when her boyfriend lost the piece of paper with her address and had no other way of contacting her. When they saw each other again after 20 years, she writes, “Our long-lost love was still there.”

QUARTZ

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It was a very subdued Rogan who left his grandmother's parlor and

swung by the gallery just past closing. He didn't want to believe he'd

seen what he knew he'd seen. Just as Maggie had once said, when a

couple is intimate, they throw off signals.

His grandmother, for God's sake, was flirting with Maggie's

moon-faced uncle from Galway.

Born in Fire

Ways your parents' behaviors shaped who you are today

When she'd run out of steam, Stella rubbed her hands over her face. "Goddamn it."

"That's a lot of bitching, whining, and venom to pack into a quarter of an hour. 

She sounds like a very talented woman."

It took Stella a minute—a minute where she let her hands slide into her lap 

so she could stare into Roz's face. Then she let her own head fall back 

with a peal of laughter.

"Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, she's loaded with talent. Thanks."

"No problem. My mama spent most of her time—at least the time 

we were on earth together—sighing wistfully over her health. Not 

that she meant to complain, so she said. I very nearly put that on her 

tombstone. 'Not That I Mean to Complain.'"

"I could put 'I Don't Ask for Much' on my mother's."

"There you go. Mine made such an impression on me that I went 

hell-bent in the opposite direction. I could probably cut off a limb, 

and you wouldn't hear a whimper out of me."

"God, I guess I've done the same with mine. 

I'll have to think about that later." 

Blue Dahlia

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By Humyra khandoker - Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0, 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=76617469

Whether your parents were your best friends or you barely knew them, 

your relationship with Mom and Dad had an impact on who you are today.

MSN

Living in Limbo

"Do you have something profound to say?" she asked Doug.

He walked over, sat down, leaning forward with his hands dangling between his knees. 

His gaze was sharp on her face. "All my life, as long as I can remember, you've been the ghost

 in the house. Doesn't matter which house, you were always there, just by not being there. 

Every holiday, every event, even ordinary days, the shadow of you darkened the edges. There were times, plenty of times, I hated you for that."

"Pretty inconsiderate of me to get myself snatched that way."

"If it weren't for you, everything would've been normal. My parents would still be together."

"Oh Christ." She said it on a sigh.

"If it weren't for you, everything I did growing up 

wouldn't have had that shadow at the edges. I wouldn't have seen the panic in my mother's

 eyes every time I was five minutes late getting home. I wouldn't have heard her 

crying at night, or wandering around the house like she was looking for 

something that wasn't there."

Birthright 

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By Sheba_Also 43,000 photos - 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/shebalso/20984381884/, CC BY-SA 2.0, 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=72977824

What it really feels like when a loved one goes missing

The majority of missing people return fairly quickly, but around 1% don’t. Their cases remain open for a year of more – and some for much longer. In the meantime, their friends and relatives must live with the uncertainty and hope of finding what happended to their loved ones, sometimes for many years.

The Conversation

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The fabric of their lives woven over the past twenty-five years had been torn. 

Their routines of home and work and family shattered.

Their world became the hospital, the being there, 

the going to and from, the constant juggling on snatches of 

sleep and rushed meals between. The demands of work, the people 

and animals depending on them, the low simmer of worry for Cora.

If Alice’s return created such tears and breakage, Bodine thought, 

how much had her careless departure caused so long ago?

Come Sundown

What happens to your body when you cry?

“I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

“I cry easily. You should see me after a greeting-card commercial on TV.”

All I want for Christmas

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By Rob from Sydney, Australia - Tears, CC BY 2.0, 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=10289118

Whether triggered by sad movies or happy reunions, 

stubbed toes or allergies, 

crying seems to serve many purposes.

MNN

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He brushed the hair back from her face. "You've got a right to break

down. I don't know anyone else who'd have made it this far without a blowout.

But don't cry anymore, M.J. It rips me up."

"I hate to cry." She sniffled, knuckled tears away.

"I'm glad to hear it."

Captive Star

Guaranteeing a second date while on a first date

“This is all ammunition, Cart. All ammo. You want to be able to order a nice bottle of wine. 

Oh, and after dinner, if she says how she doesn’t want dessert, you suggest 

she pick one and you’ll split it. Women love that. Sharing dessert’s sexy.”

Vision in White

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By Morgan - originally posted to Flickr as Cheesecake, CC BY 2.0, 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=10226856

Couples on Channel 4's First Dates were analysed, with some interesting findings

Mirror

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She smiled. “Look how cute you are in your smarty-pants. Now why don’t you order dessert, 

so I can pretend to be self-righteous and not—then eat half of yours?”

They lingered. She’d forgotten what it was like to have a meal with a man she could have

long, twisty conversation with. One who listened, who paid attention—whether or not 

he was thinking about the possible bonus round at the end of the evening.

He made her think, she realized. And entertained her. 

Vision in White

The emotional depth of animals

Lil wound her way, following the trail formed by feet trampling through the snow.

He was waiting for her, pacing, watching, calling. At her approach, the cat rubbed its body against the fencing, then stood, bracing his fore paws against it. And purred.

Six months since he’d seen her—scented her, Lil thought. But he hadn’t forgotten her. “Hello, Baby.”

She reached through to stroke the tawny fur, and he bumped his head affectionately to hers.

“I missed you, too.”

He was four now, full-grown, lithe and magnificent. He hadn’t been fully weaned when she’d found him, and his two litter mates, orphaned and half starved. She’d hand-fed them, tended them, guarded them. And when they’d been old enough, strong enough, had reintroduced them to the wild.

But he’d kept coming back.

She’d named him Ramses, for power and dignity, but he was Baby.

And her one true love.

“Have you been good? Of course, you have. You’re the best. Keeping everybody in line? I knew I could count on you.”

As she spoke and stroked, Baby purred, hummed in his throat, and looked at her with golden eyes full of love.

She heard movement behind her, glanced back. The one Tansy had called Eric stood staring. “They said he was like that with you, but . . . I didn’t believe it.”

Black Hills

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Other animals have 'human' emotions, too

Emotions are like organs: vital and universal, and not just for our species, primatologist Frans de Waal argues in a new book.

Mother Nature Network

Can people be saved from a terrible childhood?

"But answer this last question.
Do you think that bright, troubled child should be denied a full and
normal life as an adult because he had the bad luck to be conceived by a
heartless, perhaps even evil woman?"
"No." His breath shuddered out. "No, that's not what I think."
"No buts this time? No qualifications? Then I'll tell you that in my
professional opinion, I couldn't agree with you more. He deserves
everything he can grab, everything he can make, and everything we can
give him to show him that he's his own person and not the damaged
product of one vile woman."


Rising Tides

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By Mohamed Haddi [CC BY-SA 3.0  

(https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], from Wikimedia Commons

US researchers have found early intervention can help prevent
negative experiences in infancy turning into long-term health risks

At bottom there is a revolutionary idea. It’s about moving 
from ‘what’s wrong with you?’ to ‘what happened to you?’

The Guardian

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"He knew them—better than I did. When he died, I figured they'd ship me off,
or I'd have to run off.
I never figured they'd keep me around.
They didn't know me, so what did they care? But they kept their promise to Ray. They changed their lives around for him,  and for me. They made a home—
pretty wild one at first with Cam running it."
For the first time since he'd begun, some of the misery lifted.  Humor slid into his voice.
"He was always blowing something up in the microwave or flooding
the kitchen. Guy didn't have a clue. I pushed at them, gave them—Cam mostly—as much grief as I could dish out. And I could dish out plenty. I kept waiting for them to kick me out, or smack me senseless.
But they stuck with me. They stood up for me, and when Gloria tried to hose them like she'd done with Ray,  they fought for me.
Even before we found out I was Ray's grandson, they'd made me one of them."


Chesapeake Blue

Could your child survive alone in the woods?

The kid had been out for a minimum of two hours, she thought. A lifetime for worried parents.

But toddlers didn’t have any real sense of time. Children of his age were very mobile, she mused, and didn’t always understand the concept of being lost. They wandered, distracted by sights and sounds, and had considerable endurance, so it might be hours of that wandering before Hugh tired out and realized he wanted his mother.

She watched a rabbit skitter away into the brush. Peck had too much dignity to do more than spare it a passing glance.

But a little boy? Fiona thought. One who loved his “Wubby,” who enjoyed animals? One his mother said was fascinated by the forest? Wouldn’t he want to try to catch it, probably hoping to play with it?

He’d try, wouldn’t he, to follow it? City boy, she thought, enchanted with the woods, the wildlife, the other of it all.

How could he resist?

The Search 

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There's a hierarchy of survival skills that are appropriate for children.

For any parent, the idea of your children wondering lost and alone in the wilderness is a terrifying one. A family in California had their worst fears come true on March 1, 2019.

Two sisters, ages 8 and 5, miraculously survived 44 hours alone in the woods in freezing temperatures. But it wasn't just luck that kept them safe.

mother nature network

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“Where'd you find him?” Trent asked Nathaniel quietly.

“Up on the cliffs, holed up in a crevice in the rocks.”

“Good God.” C.C. shuddered. “Did he spend the night up there?”

“Looked that way. I had this feeling, I can't explain it. And there he was.”

Megan's Mate

It's not all hearts and flowers

"I didn't forget you either."

"Didn't you?"

"Nope." He opened a drawer. "I didn't leave it out because I wasn't sure 
what the maid might make of it."

Lana stared as he pulled out a can of Boston baked beans. 
When he dropped it into her hand, grinned at her, her heart not only tripped, 
it fell with a splat.

"That just tears it. I'm done in by a can of beans." 
She pressed it against her heart and began to weep.

"Oh Jesus, Lana, don't cry. It was a joke."

Birthright 

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Gaelle Marcel gaellemm [CC0], via Wikimedia Commons

Women reveal the seemingly unromantic gestures that REALLY say 'I love you' - from cleaning up sick to practical presents

DailyMail

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"Then we will go down and face the chicken together."

"Really? You'd do that?"

"I'll also face the crab dip and the pasta salad with you. Such is the depth of my love, even at six o'clock in the morning."

Spock rose, yawned, stretched. 

"And apparently his. If we poison people, Cilla, we'll do it together."

"I feel better. I know when I'm being a maniac."

She walked to him, leaned down and kissed his sleepy mouth. 

"And I know when I'm lucky to have someone who'll stick with me through it, right down to the crab dip."

Tribute

Want to live longer? Have a blazing row

“And I'll remind you of the night you asked me to marry you, when you gave me

flowers and candlelight, then shouted at me and raged up and down the room,

making me love you even more.”

“If that's all it takes, you'll be delirious about me by the time I'm sixty.”

Suzanna's Surrender

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Brocken Inaglory [GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) 

or CC BY-SA 3.0 (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)]

Couples who argue have a lower risk of ill health and dying prematurely, study finds

It might not seem like it at the time, but having a blazing row with your partner could be good for you.

Those who argue with one another have a lower risk of ill health and dying prematurely, scientists have found.

DailyMail




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She glanced around. "God! There must be something to throw."
"Don’t think about it," he advised. "Just grab the first thing and let it fly."
She snatched up her hairbrush, heaved it. It cracked solidly against the jewel-toned
shade of her bedside lamp. "Damn it! Damn it, that was Tiffany. Can’t I even have a
successful temper tantrum?"
"You should have thrown it at me." He grabbed her arms before she could go clean
up the mess she’d made.
"Just let me go."
"I’m not going to do that."
"I’m stupid." The fight went out of her. "All I’ve done is embarrass myself and break
a beautiful lamp shade. I should’ve taken a Xanax."
"Well, you didn’t, and I prefer fighting with a woman who’s not hazy on some
tranquilizer. These are real feelings, Tia, and you’ll have to deal with them. Whether
you want mine or not, you’ll have to deal with them."


Three Fates